Episode 5 - Mister Magnificent
SHEPHERD
Then there’s the fact that Congress banned the sale of Tenebra to people of African descent. A ban you support, because quote, its effect on non-Europeans warrants further study. End quote.
SAILOR
And all of that is true. Look, there’s no reason to believe Tenebra is unsafe for its intended purpose. It was never intended for non-Europeans. Plus, even when the Black Friday phenomenon reasserts itself and an individual has to be on Tenebra indefinitely, there’s no reason to think the drug will cause any long-term
CUT TO
REPORTER
No it’s okay. If we can hear the sound of the cars on the road, then we know close it is to the beach. I think it gives it a bit of color, don’t you?
(beat)
Are we rolling?
(beat)
Okay
(beat)
Jesus, what a disaster. There’s no one here yet. It’s incredible.
(beat)
All right we’re gonna cut to-? I’ll be ready.
(verbal exercises)
What a to-do to die today
At a minute or two to two
A thing distinctly hard to say
But harder still to do.
(beat)
Dash Hammet here at the scene of the spill. Where as you can see the tanker is on its side and partially submerged. Somewhere between ten to thirty thousand barrels of oil have already spilled out into the sound. Authorities are nowhere in sight and the oil companies -
SONIC BOOM
THUNDER RUMBLES
REPORTER 1
Whoa. What was ...
(beat)
Ladies and gentlemen that sounded like an explosion over at the tanker.But I don’t actually ….
(beat)
Something is happening over at the tanker.
SOUNDS OF METAL CREAKING
REPORTER 1
I’m not sure how to describe it ladies and gentlemen. But it looks like …
(beat)
It looks like the tanker is moving.
(beat)
It looks like it’s … it’s definitely rising out of the water.
(beat)
I don’t know if you can hear that or feel that ladies and gentlemen. It feels like very small explosions? Footsteps? I can’t hoenstly tell, but the boat is coming ashore.
(beat)
From this distance I think I can make out.
(beat)
That can’t be right.
(beat)
There’s someone under the keel.
Ladies and gentlemen I think I see someone under the boat and it’s their footsteps that you can hear right now. That are causing the ground to shake like that.
(beat)
Ralph, are you getting this? It’s incredible.
(beat)
Whoever it is is doing something to the boat. I think he’s fixing the leak? I can’t really tell from this distance. But he’s brought most of the tanker on to the shore and it looks like … stopped a majority of the leakage.
(beat)
I think he saw us.
WHOOSH SFX
MR. MAGNIFICENT
Don’t be afraid!
REPORTER 1
(screams)
How did you get here so fast?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
I can move a little faster than most people.
REPORTER
Uhh … okay. I … thanks, I think?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
No problem! Now if you’ll-
REPORTER
Wait! I have questions!
MR. MAGNIFICENT
I won’t be a minute.
WHOOSH SFX
REPORTER
All right. So he flew away. I guess he can do that. He’s hovering over the water now.
FWOOM
REPORTER
Jesus Christ that was bright.
MR. MAGNIFICENT
Keep your eyes closed!
(long beat)
MR. MAGNIFICENT
You can open them now.
REPORTER
What did … what did you do?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
Oil floats on water. I generated a high frequency plasma wave to burn it all off.
REPORTER
… You can do that?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
Yeah, it’s just well-applied static electricity. Like running a comb through your hair. Or lightning, I guess. Just bigger and more controlled.
REPORTER
But wouldn’t the heat kill everything?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
The process isn’t perfect, but I only needed to do it for a fraction of a fraction of a second to get all the oil. Aside from that, nothing got singed.
(beat)
You are okay, aren’t you?
REPORTER
I … I think …
(beat)
I mean. Who ARE you?
MR. MAGNIFICENT
You can call me
(beat)
MISTER MAGNIFICENT
CUT TO
SOARING MUSIC
REPORTER 2
This is incredible. Mr. Magnificent is … he’s just LIFTING the entire submarine clear out of the water. Ralph, are you getting all this?
BYSTANDER 1
Oh my god what was that? Is that a bird? It’s just - OH MY GOD HE CAUGHT HER! HE CAME OUT OF FUCKIN’ NOWHERE AND JUST CAUGHT HER!
CUT TO
REPORTER 3
Mr. Magnificent saves the day again by stopping a runaway train.
CUT TO
NEW YORKER CIVILIAN
We wouldn’t be alive if it wasn’t for Mr. Magnificent.
CUT TO
CHILD
Thank you Mr. Magnificent for saving my mommy and daddy.
CUT TO
REPORTER 4
The landslides in Colorado would have been a disaster of monumental proportions if Mr. Magnificent had not intervened.
CUT TO
REPORTER 5
We all owe a debt of thanks to Mr. Magnificent for all his selfless work. Mr. Magnificent, wherever you are, America thanks you.
MUSIC SLOWS
MR. MAGNIFICENT/ANDREW (V.O)
All superheroes need a secret identity.
And I’m no exception.
ANDREW (V.O. cont)
My name is Andrew Clarkson. Until recently, I was just a regular guy. Hustling. Picking up freelance gigs. Living with my girlfriend, Bianca. But then I’ve always been a little special.
ALARM CLOCK RINGS
ALARM CLOCK STOPS
BIANCA
(yawns)
How long have you been awake?
ANDREW
The alarm just woke me.
BIANCA
Why do you have it so loud? Don’t you have like … super hearing?
ANDREW
I’m sorry, what did you say?
BIANCA
(laughs)
Shut up.
(beat)
BIANCA
So are you gonna stay in again today?
ANDREW
I might run some errands. But no superhero stuff.
BIANCA
So we’re sure now. The Black Friday phenomenon does not affect superpowers.
ANDREW
At least not my superpowers.
SUMMONING SFX
BIANCA
Why do you Force-pull your bathrobe from across the apartment? Why not just leave it on the floor next to the bed like the rest of us?
ANDREW
It’s not the Force it’s-
BIANCA
Yeah, yeah, a quantum gravity telekinetic chrono-synclastic yadda yadda. Alien powers.
ANDREW
Do you want your bathrobe too? Or do you want to walk over there and get it?
BIANCA
Hmm … how cold is it?
ANDREW
It’s about 34 fahrenheit in here.
BIANCA
Fuck that. Have I told you how much I love it when you magically summon things across the room for me? It’s one of your most attractive qualities.
ANDREW
Uh huh.
SUMMONING SFX
ANDREW
Wait, why don’t you keep your robe close by? What do you do when I’m away?
BIANCA
Usually I seduce someone into getting things for me while you’re gone.
ANDREW
(laughs)
Don’t you have work?
BIANCA
Yeah, but I can hang back for a bit. I totally understand that you don’t want to be seen as Mr. Magnificent right now-
ANDREW
It’s not that. It’s just ...
(beat)
BIANCA
I’ve been a person of color my entire life. This is new to you. Think of it as a brand new superpower.
ANDREW
How so?
BIANCA
Well. Now you can show that the Black Friday phenomenon isn’t a bad thing. If it affects Mr. Magnificent, then it can’t be a sickness. Or divine retribution. It can happen to anyone, so the best thing to do is be chill about it.
ANDREW
(sighs)
You’re probably right. I’ll be okay.
BIANCA
You’re sure?
ANDREW
I’m Mr. Magnificent. Of course I’m sure. Besides, I’ve got to talk to some clients about wireframes and then pick up stuff for dinner.
BIANCA
All right. I’m gonna hop in the shower.
BIANCA gets up.
SHOWER starts running.
ANDREW turns on TV
REPORTER
It’s been ten days since Mr. Magnificent’s last sighting. No explanation is forthcoming about his disappearance, leading many to speculate about the fate of our beloved hero.
AD
Talk to your doctor before taking Tenebra
CUT TO Bodega.
Door JINGLES
ATTENDANT
Welcome to Jonny’s Bodega! Let me know if we can be of any assistance.
ANDREW
Thank you.
(long beat)
Door JINGLES
THIEF
This is a stick-up! Put the money in the bag!
ATTENDANT
(shaky)
Okay, okay, just don’t shoot.
(beat)
THIEF
This is it? Don’t be holding out on me now!
ATTENDANT
It’s only 8:30 in the morning! No one’s been here yet.
THIEF runs out
Door JINGLES
ANDREW
Hey, are you okay?
ATTENDANT
I’m fine. Just … at least he didn’t get away with much.
ANDREW
Call the cops. I’ll try and see where he went.
ATTENDANT
He has a gun,
Door JINGLES
ATTENDANT (cont)
be careful!
CHASE MUSIC BEGINS
ANDREW
This looks like a job for - wait, shit. I don’t have my costume.
CHASE MUSIC STOPS
(beat)
Wait, no one’s going to recognize me anyway!
CHASE MUSIC BEGINS
WHOOSHING SFX
THUD
THIEF
URGH!
ANDREW
Hey man. I’m gonna need you to give the money back and surrender.
THIEF
Who the fuck are you?
ANDREW
I’m … not important. Just hand over the money and your gun.
THIEF
I’m not giving shit to you, hey, whoaaa! PUT ME DOWN! PUT ME DOWN! PUT ME DOWN!
SIRENS
ANDREW
Here come the cops now.
OFFICER 1 (megaphone)
HANDS UP!
ANDREW
It’s okay, guys it’s … me - I uhh ... caught the robber.
OFFICER 1
HANDS! UP!
SFX as ANDREW drops THIEF
ANDREW
All right. They’re up.
ANDREW (aside)
Now I’m glad I don’t have super hearing.
OFFICER 1
What’s this now? The gun and the loot. Looks like we caught the two perps. Did you frisk them both?
ANDREW
Officers, officers you don’t understand. I was just-
OFFICER 1
Did I say you could speak?
ANDREW
I’m just trying to explain-
OFFICER 2
Look at this. Think we got a smart brother over here who’s gonna say this is a big misunderstanding.
ANDREW
Now wait-
OFFICER 1
Taze him. Maybe that’ll shut him up.
SFX tazer
(beat)
OFFICER 1
… what the fuck? That should’ve dropped him.
ANDREW
Probably just low batteries.
OFFICER 2
Cuff ‘em both. We’ll take them down to the precinct.
SFX handcuffs
JAIL CELL SFX
CUT to CITY JAIL
ANDREW (V.O)
So now I’m in jail. Bianca’s gonna have a fit.
(beat)
I could just break out. But that would probably just make things worse.
OFFICER 1
(loudly)
Clarkson! Andrew!
ANDREW
Present! I mean. Here!
OFFICER 1
We wanna talk to you. Just so you know, you can decline until your lawyer shows up.
ANDREW
No, I’ll talk.
DOOR opens
OFFICER 2
Well, well. Enjoying your stay?
(beat)
OFFICER 1
Ignore my partner. They can be a dick. Do you need anything? Coffee? Water?
OFFICER 2
I don’t get why you’re nice to the perps. He was at the scene of the crime. He had the weapon in his hand! Open and shut case.
ANDREW
Wait a minute, he gave me the gun.
OFFICER 2
See? He admitted it. We’re wasting our time on this nonsense.
OFFICER 1
Just be quiet.
(beat)
He gave you his gun? Were you working together?
OFFICER 2
Of course they were!
ANDREW
No we weren’t. I wasn’t involved in the robbery at all. I just … went after him.
OFFICER 2
So let me get this straight. You want us to believe that you chased down an armed perp on your own and disarmed him? Out of the goodness of your own heart? Ha ha, that’s fuckin’ funny bud. Probably thinks he’s Mr. Magnificent or some shit.
OFFICER 1
Can the back-chatter, all right?
(beat)
OFFICER 1 (cont)
Be really clear Andy. You’re saying that you’re the one who apprehended the perp?
ANDREW
That’s exactly what I’m saying
OFFICER 1
Because the perp is saying you and he both planned it together.
ANDREW
(shocked beat)
What?!
OFFICER 2
Yeah. Standard two-man operation. You went in to scope the place. Called him in when the coast was clear. Planned to split the loot later on.
OFFICER 1
Except he said that you got cold feet.
ANDREW
That’s a lie. He’s lying.
OFFICER 2
Why would he lie about this?
OFFICER 1
And we spoke to the clerk. He said you and the perp were the only ones at the store that morning.
OFFICER 2
Hell of a coincidence.
OFFICER 1
Look, your friend is willing to send you up the river. But we don’t trust him. And you’re right not to trust him. Tell us what really happened. Then we can help you.
(beat)
OFFICER 1 (cont)
Does he have something on you? Like do you owe him money?
ANDREW
This is … this is insane. I didn’t help him rob the store! I never met him before today!
OFFICER 2
But he knows your name and address.
OFFICER 1
Settle down now, partner.
(beat)
OFFICER 1 (cont)
Listen to me Andrew. You could go away for a long time for this. But the judge might be lenient if you confess to your part in it.
OFFICER 2
Take the offer, son. It’s the only one you’re gonna get.
(long beat)
ANDREW
(deep breath)
I need you both to get out of my cell.
OFFICER 2
See, I told you it was a waste of time.
ANDREW
The guy is lying. I don’t know why but he is. Please just get out of my cell.
OFFICER 1
(beat)
I’m sorry we couldn’t help you Andrew. Whatever happens next is on you.
CUT TO
Phone DIALING
RINGING
VOICE
THIS IS A CALL FROM A CORRECTIONAL FACILITY FROM INMATE 210551, LAST NAME CLARKSON, FIRST NAME ANDREW. PRESS 1 TO ACCEPT THE CHARGES.
BEEP
BIANCA
Andrew? Is that you?
ANDREW
Yeah. It’s me.
BIANCA
Are you okay? How were you arrested?
ANDREW
It’s a long story. Listen, I just got arraigned and they won’t grant bail because it was a crime of violence-
BIANCA
Wait, crime of violence? What happened?
ANDREW
Some dude tried to rob the store. I stopped him, but the cops want to pin it on us. Well, on me.
BIANCA
Why?
ANDREW
Apparently, there’s been reports of suspicious looking people in the neighborhood.
BIANCA
What does suspicious looking mean? ‘Black male between five one and six eight’ suspicious? ‘Last seen wearing clothes’ suspicious? ‘The bulge in his pocket may be his wallet, but assume it’s a deadly weapon’? That kind of suspicious?
ANDREW
Look, it’s a big misunderstanding. Once the judge hears what I have to say-
BIANCA
What did your lawyer say?
ANDREW
Why do I need one? I’m innocent.
BIANCA
That’s … that’s not how it works. Christ, I thought we’d have more time to get you up to speed on this.
ANDREW
Up to speed on what? I’m just as confused as you are. Why did the cops lie about me and the perp?
BIANCA
Oh honey.
(beat)
They lie all the time. Especially during interrogations.
ANDREW
That can’t be right. I mean, I’ve apprehended folks before and-
BIANCA
Yes, and those times were different. Let’s not get too into the past right now. These walls have ears, even though you don’t have super hearing.
ANDREW
(beat)
You’re right.
(beat)
So what do I do?
BIANCA
We need to hire you a lawyer.
ANDREW
No lawyers. I’m innocent. I just need to explain it to the judge.
BIANCA
Think about that for a second. What do you think is going to happen? They’re going to call the store clerk and the two cops. They’re all going to say that two Black men entered the store, one right before the other. Maybe the first one was casing the joint. But the second one did the deed. Then one of them got cold feet, or greedy - you know how these negroes are - and that’s where the heroic cops found them.
ANDREW
But none of that is true, Bea-
BIANCA (over Andrew)
And they’ll get the clerk to identify the two suspects. ‘Can you point them out in this courtroom? Yes sir, that’s them over there.’
ANDREW
Okay, okay. Maybe I’m in over my head.
BIANCA
Maybe you are.
ANDREW
I should hire a lawyer.
BIANCA
We should hire a lawyer. I’ll shake some trees. Meanwhile, try and stay out of trouble. Okay?
ANDREW
Okay. I love you.
BIANCA
I love you, too.
EXECUTIVE 1 (over BIANCA)
Okay, okay, I’ve seen enough. That’s all you’ve shot for the pilot, right?
PRODUCER
Ya, ya, so far. Plus three different endings.
EXECUTIVE 1
I like it. Though ...
(beat)
I dunno. It doesn’t quite connect, you know?
PRODUCER
What do you mean?
EXECUTIVE 1
You’re saying that a superhuman being would be affected by the Black Friday phenomenon? I mean, we wanna reboot Mr. Magnificent but isn’t this too … what’s the word?
EXECUTIVE 2
Woke-washing?
EXECUTIVE 1
Not the word I was thinking of, but I’ll take it.
PRODUCER
Well, we haven’t decided on the end yet.
EXECUTIVE 1
What are the options?
PRODUCER
Scenario one. Picture this - dramatic courtroom scene. Mr. Magnificent - or Andrew - led to the dock in shackles. The cops are lying through their teeth to the judge! Andrew just sits there and takes it. Then, Andrew stands up slowly. He just peels the cuffs off his arms and then he rises into the air in a terrifying display of his power. It’s like there’s a thunderstorm brewing inside the courtroom.
CUT TO
MR. MAGNIFICENT
(kind of like the Avatar State)
Enough of these lies. I have held my tongue long enough, and I cannot be silent any longer.
CUT TO
EXECUTIVE 2
Eh, a little too deus ex machina isn't it? Why wouldn’t he have just demonstrated his powers to the cops when they arrested him? What’s the second ending?
CUT TO
MR. MAGNIFICENT
Admit it! You lied about the evidence! You lied on the witness stand! You lied about everything in this case! Tell the truth!
OFFICER 2
The truth?! YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!
CUT TO
EXECUTIVE 1
I dunno. I’m not really vibe-ing with the A Few Good Men ending. What’s contestant number three looking like?
CUT TO
THE NEWSREADER
We have breaking news on a story that’s rapidly developing. We go now to our reporter on the scene.
REPORTER
I’m standing outside the city jail where, as you can see, it looks like a bomb went off. We haven’t had any reports of injuries but it looks like this may have been a jailbreak.
THE NEWSREADER
Any word on who might have broken out?
REPORTER
I just spoke to the warden who assured me that only one cell was compromised. The rest of the population is on lockdown. The missing prisoner is one Andrew Clarkson, recently arrested and convicted of armed robbery. But it’s hard to imagine how he could have done this alone.
THE NEWSREADER
Can you speculate on how he broke out?
REPORTER
Like I said, it looks like there was an explosion but it’s hard to imagine how he could have assembled a bomb, or had one smuggled in. Plus, even if he used a bomb to blow open his cell door, he would have severely injured himself in the explosion. There is one possibility, but I have to say that the evidence for it is less than conclusive.
THE NEWSREADER
We go live now to the chief of police who is giving a press conference.
CHIEF
Security footage has been damaged, but our preliminary investigation points to only one plausible explanation. It appears that Mr. Magnificent broke through the security perimeter and released Mr. Clarkson from his cell. Now like I said earlier, I was shocked. Mr. Magnificent has been a pillar of our community, and someone who fights for justice. But in this, he has acted as if he was above the law. Andrew Clarkson and Mr. Magnificent are both fugitives. They are considered potentially armed and dangerous. We are offering a two million dollar reward to anyone who has information that would lead to their capture. Thank you.
CUT TO
EXECUTIVE 1
Ohohoho. That’s brilliant! I love it! A vigilante superhero. Every week he’s facing some new threat that needs more than his superpowers.
EXECUTIVE 2
I mean, I’m a little anxious that a Black superhero is technically a felon. But I love the wrongful conviction angle. Really highlights how unfairly people are treated once they’ve been affected by Black Friday.
EXECUTIVE 1
We could do whole season arcs of this!
EXECUTIVE 2
Plus we’d make a mint in syndication, and I know that the streaming services will just gobble this up. Peak prestige TV.
EXECUTIVE 1
All right. I’m on board! We’re greenlighting two seasons of the Mr. Magnificent reboot. We’ve got a hit on our hands guys. A goddamn solid gold HIT!